WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE PINAY IN CALIFORNIA

I almost titled this "What It's Like to Be Pinay in America" but remembered that my fellow Pinays who grew up or live outside California have a totally different perspective of life in this country than I do. If you want to add anything else, please use the Comments box -- I'd love to see this list get really long.

1. Non-Filipinos like to tell you how much they love pancit and lumpia (which they eat because they have Filipino friends or neighbors. Who apparently are all "really nice people.").
2. Then they ask you if you can make either or both for the next office potluck.
3. When you go to an all-you-can-eat Asian buffet restaurant, you notice many of the other patrons are Filipino, too. And they're all headed for the tempura shrimp (but not the veggies) and mayo-stuffed prawn.
4. You think it's normal for guests to take leftover food home from parties. Or to bring their own tupperware just in case the hosts run out of aluminum foil and plastic bags.
5. If you're thin and fair-skinned people think you're Chinese.
6. If you're not-so-thin and dark-skinned people think you're Samoan.
7. If you've dyed your hair brown people think you're Mexican (whether you're fair or dark-skinned, thin or not-so-thin).
8. If you've dyed your hair brown or bleached your hair blonde AND you wear green or blue or gray-colored contact lenses then you're just scary-looking (sorry, the truth hurts).
9. Some idiot of a teacher back in grammar school told your class that the Philippines is located in the South Pacific and you believed her. So now you think you're Hawaiian. Especially if you're a car import model with a Friendster or My Space site.
10. If you're in your mid-30s to mid-40s you once danced the cha-cha to a Madonna song (maybe even Borderline).
11. And you once dated a Filipino guy who wore MC Hammer pants. Who bought the rest of his clothes at Chess King.
12. But you can't tease him about it now because you once teased and sprayed your hair so high up in front that it was nicknamed "the Wall."
13. You get TFC at home and you watch ASAP even if you have to turn the volume all the way down because everyone screams or screeches when they sing -- especially the ones who are known as the "Champions."
14. Then you wonder why Filipino entertainers in America look more Filipino than those working in the Philippines.
15. And you also wonder if Piolo is really gay and hope that he isn't really (oops sorry, that's just me!).

Comments

[NYCMama]

16. They ask you if you know any nannies.

17. They think you ARE a nanny!

[Olive]

18. All Pinays that go home to PI watch WOWOWEE live and love to join the game "Bigatin".

19. Aside from being asked if you're a nanny, they also ask you if you're a nurse.

[Gigi]

This is something my friend Sandra emailed me (similar to #19):

"People always want to know if you're a nurse or if someone in your family is (of course I have a cousin who IS a nurse). Or they often tell me that the nurse that took care of them in the hospital was Filipino."

[Sandra]

#9 Reminds me of Tia Carrere - who says she's Hawaiian, Chinese, Filipino and Spanish - and Nicole from "The Pussycat Dolls" - who is Hawaiian, Filipino and Russian(okay). Can't they just be Pinay? Because I too am Filipino, Chinese, Japanese and Spanish, but I dont' check all the boxes on surveys or applications:)

[Mai]

Naku the famous looompia. It's more popular than adobo pala.

....you spend a lot of money on instant champorado and red eggs

....you look at the meat in the grocery and wonder where all the taba is (and if they are so conscious about trimming the fat why are womens underwear sold in sizes so big you never knew such a size existed before)

[BatJay, Ang Dating Folk Singer ng Ma Mon Luk]

GREAT POST, Miss KapitBahay.

I always get mistaken for a latino or a mexican and I always get "your english is so good" comment once they find out i'm not from here.

I always give my standard reply - "your english is so good too" to my new found american friends who marvel at my great command of their language.

[Gigi]

Hi Mai - I LOVE that -- that's exactly how they always say it: looom-pia! And yes, it is more popular than adobo for the Pinoy challenged. :) I enjoyed your contributions, too; I've been here for so long that I forgot how things like instant champorado and red eggs ARE more expensive to buy here, and how the meat is usually trimmed of fat.

Hello KB Batjay - WOW, I got the Batjay seal of approval -- woohoo! Can I use your standard reply next time someone compliments my command of the English language, by the way? Siguro priceless ang reaction nila, 'no?

See you Thursday!

[blueeagle]

one i heard:

20. "if you're bigger than an a-cup, they gotta be fake!"

what about for pinoys? my california and non-california classics:

#1. "you can't be pinoy. you're too tall. you must be part something else."

#2. (somewhere in the south. atlanta, actually). "wut iz ya?! yoo two dahk ta bee whayt and two stray-t-hay'd ta bee blayck...wut iz ya??"

[Jase]

I guess this is true in most western countries, even here in melbourne ... there's just something with the pinoys that defies ethnicity!

[Gigi]

Hey blueeagle - #20 is so, SO true!!! I wanted to put that in my list but didn't want hundreds of my fellow Pinays calling me a traitor. :) But yep, I know people who keep asking me if mine are real -- I even had one girlfriend who reached across and actually squeezed them for what seemed like an eternity to make sure they were!!!

And I LOVED your Pinoy classics. I've been guilty of thinking #1 a few times (but never saying it, of course). And #2 just killed me. :)

Hi Jase - Maybe it's because of the "mix" in the blood? Or maybe it's related to blueeagle's #2 (above comment)?

[sistah #1]

#10 - and if you're in your 50s, you cha-cha'ed to "breezin'" by george benson (as ridiculous as it sounds, i'm sure filipinos cha-cha'ed to everything!)

#11 - how could you forget the "members only" jackets?!?

[Gigi]

Sistah - Neither I nor my friends ever dated any guys who wore Members Only jackets! We were too young for that!

[JMom]

LOL! funny list :) I'll stay quiet on the members only jacket so I won't incriminate myself.

here's another not-funny humdinger if you're married to non-filipino:
"was he in the military?"
"were you pen-pals?"

[Melanie West]

JMom...hahaha.. that is so TRUE! My husband is a "kano" and I got those two questions everytime.

Olive - I get that comment about nurse too and.. oh you're english is so good..lol

And.. the famous adobo, lumpia and pancit that people would ask if I can cook it!

I love your list Gigi! Thanks for the laugh!

[Gigi]

Hi JMom - Since you're a fantastic cook/chef, do folks ask you to make loom-pia and pahn-seet for them all the time, too?

Hello Melanie - I wonder if it's mostly other Pinoys or non-Pinoys who ask you and JMom that question? Nakakapikon siguro 'no?

[Daniel]

Can't pin me down on Chess King 'cause I shopped at Oak Tree. ;)

[Gigi]

Oak Tree? Hehehe...that's only because you were a stylin'college kid in the '90s. Same difference, hehehe...

[Alternati]

HAHAHAHA... This list is hilarious! I got here from cheH.

FYI. Piolo isn't gay (daw). He has a son so at the very least, he's bisexual. :P

[Gigi]

Alternati - I think you're now my new bestfriend. :)

[petite]

gigi, i can't believe i missed this post earlier! i actually found this via cheH as well.

anyway, my 'contribution':

21. Non-Filipinos who have Filipino friends or spouses will tell you they know about "the box" you send home to the Philippines containing U.S.-bought products, especially chocolate.

btw, i'm always asked how i learned to speak such good english. my answer is that i learned it from school and tv. :-) and because i'm petite (sige na nga, short, hehe), kinda-fair but not really thin, i'm asked whether i'm japanese, chinese, korean, vietnamese, or thai.

lastly, i'm one of those pinoys who, at the all-you-can-eat asian buffet, make a beeline either for the sushi station or the shrimp tempura. hahaha!

[Nunu's mum]

Hi Gigi, it's my 1st time to leave a comment!

I get that "you can't be Filipino, you're too tall, you must be part something else" a LOT...to the point where hubs and I now say I'm part watusi*
that usually shuts 'em up...

*Watusi tribe of Africa, tallest people on earth, rumoured to be born six feet tall and grows up to a height of 8 feet.

[Gigi]

Petite - Isn't it strange how we still keep getting mistaken for practically every other Asian race but our own? And girl, you go for the good stuff, I can tell! :)

Nunu's mum - HI there! I was introduced to your funny, entertaining blog by Frayed a while back...and I'm been lurking all this time, too. :)

Sometimes I wonder what the general physical stereotype of Filipinos are -- it seems we always hear things like we're too tall, too fair, too curvy, too this, and too that. I wonder what "just right" is? :) Part Watusi...I like that (of course I hear the word and I automatically think of Amalia Fuentes and company dancing on Dance-O-Rama. Oops sorry I digress...some childhood memories are waaay too ingrained to forget).

[mell ditangco]

you are pinoy in cali when your white, black, mexican friend tells you; I can speak tagalog and proceeds to cuss you out in tagalog... p*tan* in* *o!

i miss this blog!!! hey gigi we are no longer neighbors.... I have relocated to a diff state na... :( and we never met in person... oh well...

[Manny]

Hi Gigi. This is hilarious. I got here through Rice Bowl Journals. I was also raised in California and lived there for 20 years. Oddly enough, I ignored or downplayed my Pinoy-ness during those years. But I'm more Pinoy now than I ever was in California.

I can relate to just about everything on the list. Someone did call me Samoan once. I also watch ASAP and noticed all the shouting, too. I don't care if Piolo is gay or not or whatever.

I like your site. Keep up the good work.

[Gigi]

Hi Mell - I've missed you!!! And I can't believe you moved to AZ before we got to meet. I hope you love it over there, but if not, come home. :(

Manny - Thanks! I was reading your blog and wondered if we ever bumped into each other at UCLA. A good friend of mine also volunteered at Unicamp, but it was so long ago I can't remember if she did the same time you did.

[Manny]

Hi Gigi. It's a small world, so we could have run into each other at UCLA. I was there from 1983 to 1988. I did UniCamp in 86, 87 and 88. I worked at the Students Store in Bearwear. Let me know if we could have crossed paths.

[Gigi]

Hi Manny - I know you weren't involved in Filipino-American activities back in your college days, but if you ever hung around with any Samahang-ers during the latter years, we might be able to find some common connections. :)